If you want to end mental health stigma, focus on the demographic you have control over: Yourself.
Let go of trying to change minds so the world is easier for you.
Stigma attached to mental illness isn’t going to end anytime relatively soon, and it’s healthy to accept this. Mindless stigma might not be gone until the final boomer is buried, but it will never end with organized campaigns. Yes, it is often unfair and damaging, but it’s important for people with a mental illness to understand how it came to be, and how difficult it is for people to unlearn heavily programmed beliefs.
How do we program a population to believe something that they know little about? The most effective way is to show it to them over and over again. How many times have you watched on a screen where someone did something really over the top insane, and it was attributed to their bipolar diagnosis?
The truth is bipolar people can, and do, lose their minds and enter psychosis. But the stigma attached to bipolar people is that they are perpetually unbalanced. Someone can experience psychosis once, and never experience it again, but in the minds of many that isn’t the case.
People have been conditioned to fear what they don’t understand. Bipolar people may be seen as perpetually unstable because that is the picture presented. If the only time you hear a word, like bipolar or schizophrenia, is when it is attached to a horror story, then this makes sense. People don’t often choose to educate themselves about a subject that isn’t pertinent to them. They receive their opinion from the media they consume, and accept what has been shown to them.
The tough part for those on the receiving end of unfair stigma, is when you are seen as an unbalanced, crazy person, you can lose intellectual credibility. We’ve been taught as a culture not to listen to “crazy” people, or pay attention to any of their beliefs or ideas.
It’s one of our greatest fears to be perceived as insane. You lose all credibility, and people fear you. It can feel like our thoughts, beliefs and opinions no longer hold any weight.
How do we end the stigma when it is still being constantly reinforced? Campaigns to “End the Stigma” only feed it because it stays fresh on people’s minds, and helps keep us separate. People who have suffered from the stigma, may feel passionate about it ending. While some want to hide their illness, others want to proudly show they are not afraid of who they are.
The way to end the stigma is to be as healthy, grounded and balanced as you can. This is something we can actually control. Changing the beliefs of a generation of people, who have had their minds effectively made up for them, is an impossible task.
By letting people see you well, after a period of poor mental health, can show others that you aren’t constantly sick. Let others decide what to believe, because stigma isn’t really going to end until mental illness does.
Real life examples of mental wellness, by those who have a psychosis and deep dark depression, can show people the truth, which is you can have a mental illness diagnosis and be mentally healthy, at the same time. With healing and self care, prolonged periods of wellness, is possible.
The truth is, stigma is real and it hurts and it’s not fair, but if you choose to stop seeing yourself as others may see you, then maybe the urgency to end the stigma can stop. We have to let go of the worry attached to the thoughts, opinions, beliefs and judgements of others, in order to heal, and focus on things within our control.
Based on my experience there is less stigma from Gen X and below. The term mental health awareness, really didn’t exist during the Boomer’s early years. It’s as though they can’t wrap their heads around it. How we are feeling has never been a priority for that generation. Of course, when I reference that generation, I don’t mean every single person. I just feel it’s difficult to understand something that was talked about or prioritized during the first half of their lives.
No one cared about their mental health, and the effects of generational trauma is a hard to accept.
But with Gen X and below most people have had close friends or family members who have had a mental illness diagnosis. They have lost childhood friends and family members, and watch observer changes over time. They can recall a version of the person before the mental illness and/or addiction took control.
Younger generations are more likely to understand that just because you have a label attached to you, it doesn’t mean mental wellness is elusive.
There are a lot of people today who trust what they learn from screens without question or discernment, and this needs to be accepted. A little bit of mental illness awareness isn’t going to change well-established beliefs, unless someone choose to educate themselves and ask questions.
It has been my experience that the more elderly people today, tend to change how they treat you once they find out. It’s just something they don’t understand, so they draw on any information they have, and that can come in the form of a stereotype.
If someone hasn’t had any first hand experience with someone with a diagnosis, like bipolar, and they’ve never done any research on their own, their reactions to becoming aware of a diagnosis can be hurtful. To experience someone treat you completely differently, often cautiously or fearfully, once they learn your label, is painful and frustrating.
I like the phrase “it is what it is,” and changing someone’s well established beliefs is not my priority.
I got to know people over time, and felt comfortable mentioning my bipolar diagnosis, only to have them treat me differently instantly, almost creating space, or being more cautious about the topics of conversation. When someone doesn’t ask you any questions, when they don’t understand what you are talking about, it means to me they don’t care what you’re talking about. Dismissed was never something I had ever felt until I received my bipolar card at twenty-five.
Biased perceptions exist, and it has been systematically ingrained. No corporate marketing campaign for abolition of mental health stigma, is going to change minds that can’t be changed.
But what if we, as an individual, just went on living without worrying about what people thought of us. I know it’s tough in workplace settings, but what can you do? The truth is people with mental illness are statistically less dependable, and need more time off. They also change jobs more quickly than people who don’t have mental illness. This requires more training time, and in capitalism money is the main objective and social etiquette and equality isn’t always a business owner’s primary objective.
Bipolar people can go crazy. It sucks, but it’s true. I don’t fault some types of business for factoring in these types of things when choosing an employee.
Perspective is everything, and rather than get caught up on the injustice, I choose to take it as a sign. I wouldn’t want to work for a boss who sees my illness before they see me. I take it as a sign, or a gift from the universe, to know where I’m not wanted, or supposed to be.
It works the same in personal relationships. If someone chooses to see me as a bipolar person with all of the standard issue stigma attached, rather than who I am presenting in front of them, then we likely have other things that aren’t in common.
I see it as an indicator, and as much as I wish stigma would end, I’m not going to waste any of my energy trying to change the minds of people who don’t matter to me. I no longer feel a need to “set people straight.” I accept how and why mental health stigma exists, and it’s not my job to change the perceptions of others.
Stigma exists for a reason, and maybe when people stop losing their minds, it will go away.
While I said Gen Xers, and below, haven’t been as judgemental based on my experiences. Stigma has a spectrum, and maybe younger generations don’t see a bipolar person as perpetually crazy, for example, but they are still cautious. That’s a good thing. They have seen the damage mentally ill people can create for themselves and others.
Find me a Gen X or Millenial who doesn’t know someone who was bipolar, and died by suicide overdose. When people are introduced to someone and learn they they are bipolar, it’s human nature to be reminded of others who have suffered with this illness.
It’s okay to cautious,
It is painful watching someone at war with their own mind, and sometimes silently, self-destruct, or create chaos.
I learned to accept that some people will never understand. Empathy isn’t inherent in all. Not everyone has the capacity to believe, anything other than what they are told to believe. It’s important to acknowledge that just because we believe something, that doesn’t make it true.
Why would the opinions of others bother me if I don’t see myself that way, and am confident in who I am?
Change is possible for what we can control – ourselves. It’s possible for me to change the way I see things, or accept the ways things are, compared to changing the minds of an entire generation.
To end the stigma, be as healthy as you can be. Put your energy into healing the wounds that created your mental illness, rather campaigning to end something that is absolutely beyond your control.
Many want to end the stigma for others because they understand the pain of it, and altruistically want it to go away. They have empathy, and don’t want others to have to go through what they went through.
Conclusion
Mental health stigma exist for a reason, and will never go away until the last Boomer is buried. That will be in 2060. This isn’t a fact, because in order for it to truly disappear mental illness needs to end. Stigma exists for a reason, and there is a degree of truth to it. It can feel unfair and unwarranted, but it is what it is, and this is the world we live in. Minds can be programmed, and crazy people make the news.
The only way to change minds is by changing yourself. Take the negativity of mindless stigma and transmuting it into something positive is possible. We have to ability to change ourselves and our own minds, but to change the minds of the masses is a daunting task. Instead, focus on healing and self care and development. Be there for others by being there for yourself.